Just when things couldn't be more perfect...

Just when things are going great, when I have never been happier in my life, it changes.

I am so confused, so hurt. I can't say I have ever felt so bad in my life. I was numb the past couple of days. Its like when you cut yourself with a really sharp object, your skin just kind of sits there, gashed open, unbelieving, and nothing happens for what seems like the longest time. Then the blood gushes and it hurts and pulsates and you wonder if it will ever stop bleeding or heal. Today is the bleeding, gushing, pulsating day.

It sure hurts for a long time and scars really bad. I wonder if I will ever heal from this. All I can do is nurse the wound and hope that time will help. I just can't believe this has happened. I am such a trusting person and that has been completely demolished. It took me 8 years to heal from the last injury to my heart.

I haven't really told anyone about this, its hurts too much and I don't know where I am heading yet. I need to decide that first, free from other people's opinions. I think I am going to make an appointment with my psychologist, so I can get an unbiased opinion. She is always there for me...

Just keep me in your thoughts :)
Kristine